Tuesday, November 17, 2009
my story
Johny threw out his water bottle as he walked into school, earphone dangling from one ear. "Your late again" The security guard smirked. "Well I got a sandwich and i had to take time to enjoy it." The security guard blankly stared at him. "look man" johny said calmy "im gonnna be in this academic factory for the next few hours, leave then come back tomarro for the next few hours. So excuse me for not trying to enjoy the few happy moments i get." "Coming into school this late makes it seem like you dont even care." The security guard stated. "If I didnt care about school, why would i come in the first place?" The security gaurd shook his head. "how are the kids?" Johny asked with a smile. "The kids are fine, Sid in is the school play." "thats good to hear" replied johnny. "tell him i said brake a leg". With that Johny made his way up the stairs to his second period class.
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Hi Dylan. I liked your story, because it was short with a lot of action in it. The main character was witty, and carefree. He even has a cool name: Johnny. I like how you end the story by saying "tell him I said brake a leg." and how he was already running up the stairs before the security guard had stopped him.
ReplyDelete-Hannah
Dylan, In your story from what I can tell the cool layed back I don't care is I guess what you view cool as. Something I noticed about the setting is that its just the main character and the security guard. The character isn't really impressing anyone besides himself, the guard doesn't seem to care. The character does get away with being late... is it because he is so cool?
ReplyDeleteI'm not entirely sure who Johnny is referring to when he asks about the "kids". Has His Coolness sired offspring who go to the same school?
ReplyDeleteAside from being maybe a little confusing, I appreciate your story. You and Johnny seem to share the same attitude, could he possibly represent you in a parallel world?
Another reason I like your story is because it reminds me of Elias in math class. Several times when he's gotten kicked out of Mr Tsui's class, he said something like "I'mma go eat my sandwich". That always stuck with me for some reason.
I'd like to meet this Johnny guy.
Dylan,
ReplyDeleteThis basically sums it up: "'look man' Johnny said calmly, "I'm gonna be in this academic factory for the next few hours, leave then come back tomorrow for the next few hours. So excuse me for not trying to enjoy the few happy moments I get." First off, so true. Second, it seems that the idea of cool here is an easygoing person, who has a grip on what their personal values are, and are willing to stand up to authority if they are challenged. I think the character is actually more mature or intelligent than somebody who is purely school-driven, and does not take time out to enjoy life and relax. Because really, what's the point in life if it's not going to be enjoyed?
Good Job