A major part of parenting is knowing when to let go of your child. Parents will try to protect their kids for as long as they can, but parents have to let their kids live and make mistakes. Parents (especially white ones from middle america) are trying to protect their kids from every little danger. They try to create this perfect little world. The result of this are kids who are use to the easy life and don't know how to deal with any sort of struggle.
While letting your kid have freedom is good, at the same time there needs to be limits. As a parent its your to teach your kids that they cant do what ever they like. They have to learn that they can not get a candy bar just because they want one. Also when a kid does something wrong, you need to blame the kid. It seems like these days parents are ready to blame everyone but their kids when their kids do something wrong. These days everything from music to children's shows are being blamed for the problems in todays youth. Your kid isnt fat because the blue monster on sesame street eats cookies, he's fat because all he eats is candy that you keep buying for him.
I think the idea of self soothing has some merit. I think when a baby is first born you should respond right away when he cries because at that stage they cry because something is wrong. But as the baby gets older you should let them cry for abit. I think this will prevent the kid from thinking that crying will get him what he wants. When my son or daughter reaches the age of 5 crying for any reason besides sadness or because they are hurt will be overlooked. When the kid knows crying will not get them what they want they will look for other ways to get it. Best case senerio this means they will use their words.
The article about physical touch reminds me of the experiment where they put new born monkeys in a room alone. In this isolation they were given no other contact other then a stuffed monkey. The quickly grew attached to this monkey and never let go of it. When the doll was taken away they flipped out. This shows us just how important physical touch is to the development of children.
Monday, May 17, 2010
56
What kind of house were you brought up in?
-I was brought up in an average family. I had two parents a brother and a dog. I grew up in the suburbs.
-My family was kinda crazy. My mom was an artist and my dad was a musician so the arts were important.
-I kinda did my own thing as a kid. My dad wasnt in the picture and my mom worked two jobs.
How has your childhood effected you parenting?
-My mother taught me alot about respect and manners so i try to pass that along to my kids.
-I let my kids do their own thing and i try not to block their creative side
-Since my parents werent there i want to be ther for my kids.
How do you think your children will be as parents?
-I dont know because while I grew up in the suburbs they are growing up in the city which is much diffrent
-I think they will raise their kids much like i raised them.
-They will grow up in a family with a loving dad so in return they will be a loving parent
It has become clear that the type of parent someone will be depends on how they look back on their childhood. The artist was happy that his parents were free thinkers and let him be creative so in return he will do the same with his kids. On the other hand the last guy had kind of a broken home which he didnt like so he is trying to make it diffrent for his kids. Your view on your upbringing will effect your parenting.
If there was one thing you could change about the way your parents raised you what would it be?
-I was brought up in an average family. I had two parents a brother and a dog. I grew up in the suburbs.
-My family was kinda crazy. My mom was an artist and my dad was a musician so the arts were important.
-I kinda did my own thing as a kid. My dad wasnt in the picture and my mom worked two jobs.
How has your childhood effected you parenting?
-My mother taught me alot about respect and manners so i try to pass that along to my kids.
-I let my kids do their own thing and i try not to block their creative side
-Since my parents werent there i want to be ther for my kids.
How do you think your children will be as parents?
-I dont know because while I grew up in the suburbs they are growing up in the city which is much diffrent
-I think they will raise their kids much like i raised them.
-They will grow up in a family with a loving dad so in return they will be a loving parent
It has become clear that the type of parent someone will be depends on how they look back on their childhood. The artist was happy that his parents were free thinkers and let him be creative so in return he will do the same with his kids. On the other hand the last guy had kind of a broken home which he didnt like so he is trying to make it diffrent for his kids. Your view on your upbringing will effect your parenting.
If there was one thing you could change about the way your parents raised you what would it be?
Monday, May 10, 2010
54
I thought the quiz was just ok. I dont remember what I was labeled but I remember it was pretty on track and that 3.2 of "the population" were like me. The original website didnt give me enough info about "my personality" so I had to go to another. When I was reading it while I was entertained by the things about me they got right, I wasnt blown away by how much they knew me. I think its alittle bit of a stretch to say that everyone in the world falls into these catogories.
Tuesday, May 4, 2010
53
Taking the test was strange for me. My family isn't your average family. With out being self pitying or self proclaiming, I can say my family's situation is a little worse then the average. Along with that is my families don't ask don't tell attitude when it comes to family issues. So to fill out a question that asked me in depth about my family was a little strange.
While reading the scored I have to say I was a little disappointed. I was expecting some scandalous results that would be good plots for a family drama series, but everything was pretty normal. I realized that the survey showed most families as good but not amazing. for questions like "You talk to an adult in your family household for more than 5 minutes about your day, pretty much every day" the majority was yes generally. Most peoples family is in between mediocre and amazing. I wonder how this would change if we looked at a different demographic of people. How would the scores be if we looked at families who were really rich compared to families who were below the poverty line?
I read the article about teen sex and I thought a lot of it was using statistics to scare people. one fact was "Only 8% of sexually active teens use birth control pills, the most effective means of preventing pregnancy ". When I read this I was just like no shit. Being a teenager I know the only girls who use the pill are ones who have boyfriends or for some reason fuck a lot. Most teens aren't like that. Most teens have occasion sex and use simple birth control like a condom. After reading the facts I found it kind of hard to take the article seriously.
While reading the scored I have to say I was a little disappointed. I was expecting some scandalous results that would be good plots for a family drama series, but everything was pretty normal. I realized that the survey showed most families as good but not amazing. for questions like "You talk to an adult in your family household for more than 5 minutes about your day, pretty much every day" the majority was yes generally. Most peoples family is in between mediocre and amazing. I wonder how this would change if we looked at a different demographic of people. How would the scores be if we looked at families who were really rich compared to families who were below the poverty line?
I read the article about teen sex and I thought a lot of it was using statistics to scare people. one fact was "Only 8% of sexually active teens use birth control pills, the most effective means of preventing pregnancy ". When I read this I was just like no shit. Being a teenager I know the only girls who use the pill are ones who have boyfriends or for some reason fuck a lot. Most teens aren't like that. Most teens have occasion sex and use simple birth control like a condom. After reading the facts I found it kind of hard to take the article seriously.
Monday, May 3, 2010
“When I was around your age I realized life was about one thing” said my Muay Thai coach as we sat on the ring before class. “The only thing that we really care about, the only reason we do things like get a job, Is to get laid.” While the phrasing of this philosophical ideal may have been crude, the rings true. Because the fact is when we go back to our most ancient animal instinct, all we really want to do is pass on our genes in the only way we know how. Almost every choice of living we make has sex as the driving force behind it. The clothes you wear, the career you choose, and even the people you hang with are all chosen partly based on what you think will attract the best possible partners.
Another animal instinct that humans clearly possess is the desire to travel in packs. This most easily translates to conformity. Humans naturally prefer to be in some sort of group with other people. Sometimes to fit into a group we change who we are. Animals feel safe in a pack, there is safety in numbers. When you’re in a group you feel more significant. You feel like you’re part of something bigger and more important then you. Travling in a pack can also lead to making the beast with two backs.
"the biggest lie you can tell yourself is when you get what you want you will be happy" Humans can never be complete. Everyone needs some kind of struggle to define their lives. This can be the wanna be rappers trying to get rich, or the shoalin monks working for enlightenment. A hundred years ago people didnt need to look for a struggle. They had to work on their fields and crop to survive. These days are diffrent. Food can now be obtained with a simple trip around the corner. So instead people look for other problems they can devote their time to.
What is this new obsession with kids being safe. In virgina there is a strict no touching rule. A parent justifies this because they are afriad pokes will turn to fights and they are afraid of gang handshakes. It is this everything must be perfect additude (usually set forth by white adults) that I think is weakening the youth. There is a new breed of parent that wants to protect their kid from everything. They are trying to create their own little eurtopia. And this only seems to be true in America. Last year there was a series of fights. The worse injury sustained was a cut from when one kids lip hit his braces. But the parents flipped out, putting pressure on the school who was forced to suspend everyone involved. Even a kid who filmed the fights and in no way added to them was suspended. You compare this adittude to other areas of the world such as south america where a fight never involves more then the two people fighting. Maternal instinct is understandable, but shouldnt kids learn some lessons the hard way? Smooth seas never made a good mariner.
Another animal instinct that humans clearly possess is the desire to travel in packs. This most easily translates to conformity. Humans naturally prefer to be in some sort of group with other people. Sometimes to fit into a group we change who we are. Animals feel safe in a pack, there is safety in numbers. When you’re in a group you feel more significant. You feel like you’re part of something bigger and more important then you. Travling in a pack can also lead to making the beast with two backs.
"the biggest lie you can tell yourself is when you get what you want you will be happy" Humans can never be complete. Everyone needs some kind of struggle to define their lives. This can be the wanna be rappers trying to get rich, or the shoalin monks working for enlightenment. A hundred years ago people didnt need to look for a struggle. They had to work on their fields and crop to survive. These days are diffrent. Food can now be obtained with a simple trip around the corner. So instead people look for other problems they can devote their time to.
What is this new obsession with kids being safe. In virgina there is a strict no touching rule. A parent justifies this because they are afriad pokes will turn to fights and they are afraid of gang handshakes. It is this everything must be perfect additude (usually set forth by white adults) that I think is weakening the youth. There is a new breed of parent that wants to protect their kid from everything. They are trying to create their own little eurtopia. And this only seems to be true in America. Last year there was a series of fights. The worse injury sustained was a cut from when one kids lip hit his braces. But the parents flipped out, putting pressure on the school who was forced to suspend everyone involved. Even a kid who filmed the fights and in no way added to them was suspended. You compare this adittude to other areas of the world such as south america where a fight never involves more then the two people fighting. Maternal instinct is understandable, but shouldnt kids learn some lessons the hard way? Smooth seas never made a good mariner.
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